Benefits of the Love Triangle

i just got through describing why you need a love triangle.  if you haven’t read that entry, you probably need to do that for this to make sense.  but assuming (and i know how dangerous that is) you have your triangle complete, let me tell you a few benefits i see of keeping the love triangle alive in your love life.  

first, your pursuit of God brings transformation of your life that you need to be a better lover.  as you experience the love, grace, forgiveness, peace, patience, strength, joy, kindness, and blessing of God, you become a different person.  not only do you become a different person, but you become a better lover.  in any relationship, you can’t give what you don’t have.  but when you receive from God unconditional love, grace, forgiveness, etc, now you have something to share with the one you love.

second, your pursuit of God provides good boundaries for your relationship.  it’s like this.  my dog gracie wears a shock collar when she goes outside.  if she gets close to getting too far from the house and outside the safe zone, her collar beeps.  if she keeps going away from the house, the collar zaps her with an electric shock until she runs back close to the house.  God doesn’t put a collar around your neck (although it’s not a bad idea- ok maybe it is), but He does put His Spirit in your heart and the spirit warns us and even zaps us if we get outside of Christ-like behavior in the relationship.  the deal is i can’t walk with God and mistreat the person i love at the same time.  i can mistreat my wife, but i can’t walk with God and do that.  and if i try, His spirit brings conviction (the zap) either that i’m distant from Him or in disobedience to Him by the way i treat my girl. make sense? don’t answer that.

another benefit is that the triangle gives unity to my relationship.  if you and the one you love are both chasing God, you are chasing the same thing and are running together.  God isn’t a God of confusion or division, He is a God of unity and order.  translated, God won’t tell you one thing and your love another.  if your goal is God, and you both get to the goal, then by definition, you are going to come to the same place- agreement and unity.  that’s why paul told us not to get yoked up with someone who isn’t chasing God (2 Corinthians 6:14-17).  the best way to experience intimacy and closeness, is to agree that God is the goal of the relationship.  by the way, this means there is no such thing as an irreconcilable difference too. in Christ, we are always able to reconcile.

finally, the love triangle provides perspective on everything else in life.  stuff pulls at you daily- work, finances, friends, kids, hobbies- they all vie for your time, attention, and energy.  the tendency in life is to drift toward those things that make demands of you and you end up getting your priorities all out of whack and at the same time your love life loses it’s edge because your love isn’t a priority.  how do you keep from letting stuff come between you and your love?  easy, you just keep walking with God because He daily reminds you of what is most important- God first, spouse second, and then all the other stuff somewhere after that.