Small Group Curriculum

Gary Smalley: Secret of Lasting Love





Spend the week studying Ephesians 4:26-27, John 10:10, Romans 12:10, 1 John 2:3-11, and Matt. 5:23-24.

Determine which discussion points and questions will work best with your group.

Pray for our pastors and this week’s message, the upcoming group time, your group members, and their receptivity to God’s Word.

Focus on the Main Point. To value honor over anger in our relationships. Anger is rooted in selfish pride, but honor is rooted in loving and valuing others over self.


As your group time begins, use this section to help get the conversation going.

What things tend to make you angry?

What do you do when you’re angry? (vent, exercise, eat, plot revenge, etc.)

What have you found to be helpful in controlling or pacifying your anger?


Unpack the biblical text to discover what Scripture says or means about a particular topic.


How is it possible to be angry and not sin?

How do we apply the principle of refusing to let the sun set on our anger?

In what ways does anger provide a foothold for Satan in your life?


We tend to measure our spirituality based on how we treat God, but how does the Apostle John evaluate the spiritual state of a Christian?

What does it mean that hatred causes us to walk in darkness and blindness?

John says that love causes us to walk in the light and not to stumble. How does this truth play out practically in our lives?


When the Bible speaks of love, it is always tied to actions, not only feelings. So, what does it mean to you when Paul commands us to “be devoted to one another in brotherly love”?

When has a fellow Christian modeled that kind of love toward you? How did it make you feel?

Do you find it natural to “show preference to others in honor” or is it something that requires God’s intercession?


Where in your life has anger or dishonor caused pain? How can we help you take a first step toward grace and restoration?

It is human nature to say, “I will love and honor you if I think you deserve it,” but the Bible does not allow that. How can we begin to truly love and honor others without personal bias?


Is there someone you love that needs your forgiveness? How can we pray for and encourage you to take that step?

Consider Pinelake Church and also our community. Is there a particular person, group or ministry that you feel led to honor in specific ways? How will you do it?

Lastly, let’s consider one another in this group. Are we modeling this way of life when we meet and as we live around each other through the week? I want us to consider in private how we can model this love and honor among each other. As God leads, please make it a priority to pray for and bless this group that God has given you!


God has richly loved and honored each of us through His Son, Jesus. Let’s pray to have the same heart that we see in our Savior, so that our church, community and families will be blessed by how we love.


Midway through this week, send a follow-up email to your group with some or all of the following information:

Questions to consider as they continue to reflect on what they learned this week:

    • How is the peace of God overcoming anger in your life this week?
    • Who have you made a conscious effort to love and honor?
    • “How great a love the Father has lavished on us, that we would be called His children!” God has loved and honored you beyond belief. I am praying that you will reflect His heart today to everyone you encounter.